Share your journey of forgiveness, or your struggle to do so, by leaving a comment below.
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Share your journey of forgiveness, or your struggle to do so, by leaving a comment below.
(you must click on the topic title to reach the comment page)
This is a long and painful journey. It is a tremendous struggle too. Maybe by posting and sharing someone will be touched but mostly me.
My struggles to forgive involve betrayal by people very close to me and false accusations hurled at me in a means of self protection. So many times I have felt like Jesus did the last week of his life with the betrayal by very close friends. Two of them just like me. I don’t think I handled it as well as Jesus though. I let it rip me to shreds. Just like Jesus, one friend stayed and we still have to work on stuff. The other friend was just like Jesus’ friend who ran away. Thankfully, not with the end result to this person as Judas but the same end result to Jesus – extreme hurt and pain. Still when I think of all the events that have happened at the hands of Christians, I think how much worse it must have pained Jesus to have Peter and Judas betray Him at the same time.
Then the false accusations have been very hard to forgive. It is not fair to label someone as this or that just because they have gone through a particular set of circumstances. Two points before we throw out false accusations : a) have we walked in that person’s shoes to know why they acted as they did?? b) WWJD? because lest the grace of God there may I actually be too.
So months and years of pain come down to these few words. I still carry a scarlet letter and I don’t know why. If Christians are Christians don’t we try to work through things instead of betraying one another and falsely accuse each other? At this point, I don’t think that is what we do in American churches where there is way to much pretending about being and abiding in Christ.
Going from the highest of highs to the lowest of lows has not been easy. But, I have chosen to let God do open heart surgery on this masterpiece so that I may become the best me there is to glorify Him. So this current forgiveness journey is a critical component to that growth. Only as I am made totally healed of unforgiveness that I carry can I truly give to my world what Jesus has in store.
Moving forward toward His highest calling.
How can I forget in my journey Eve. Eve has been the most difficult to forgive. Eve is a very, very afraid person. The fear of abandonment taints her whole life. She lashes out on anyone who threatens her security. Justified or not she lashes out. Eve is as most women. Very pleasant on the exterior and cunning as a fox. Viscious behind the scenes that most people never even see what goes on. I feel bad for Eve and the issues she faces now and in the future because of her chosen paths, but my journey is not about her issues. My journey is about how to forgive Eve for all the pain and agony her envy has caused me.
The journey is long and hard but will be worth it in the end.
Look.. honestly i kno’ you have to forgive, lyke honestly, but then again i don’t kno’ how……does that make since to anyone???
The one girl in my life that out of all i dated made me feel lyke wanting to settle down, HURT ME and so many wayz.
She left me with a son to raise on my own for the past 2yrs.
while this &!%#$ was out partying every weekend with her ugly ass friends.
wouldn’t even stop bye and see your own son, then when yu did come around…. yu give me $20.. yu gotta be kiddin’ me.
Then i get on my feet and stuff start lookin’ a little rite…. yu choose the streets….. then to be at home, and be the mom and the family we needed…. You sleep with someone i kno’……. then yu tell me that was a tyme when yu didn’t give ah fuck about lyfe or yurself for that matter…. but we had a child…..Then 4 lyke 6months you was in & out of his lyfe……. lol…. females i kno’ what yu go threw raising them on your own……and when i think i’m finally ova yu….. yu come back into our lyfe’s…… talkin’ all that i’m ready to settle down,….. i’mma show yu…..prove it to yu………NO….. I DON’T WANT TO HEAR THAT SHIT !!!!!!
But secretly i still love her…. with all my heart….. BUT I REFUSE TO BE HURT OR 4 MATTER OUR SON BE HURT AGAIN..
I KNO’ I SHOULD 4GIVE HER… I KNOW THIS…..I JUST DON’T KNO’ HOW…. ITS’ LYKE WHAT HAPPENED TO ME….. I JUST CAN’T LET GO…..